One of the most difficult aspects of any divorce is coordinating visits with your children and your ex-spouse around important events, such as birthdays and holidays. In addition to planning the actual holiday schedule and festivities, the stress of organizing visits can be difficult to master. Consider these key thoughts to make the most of your next visitation.
1. Work From Your Agreed Visitation Schedule
Most couples will have worked out their visitation schedule to include how to navigate holidays. This may include alternating every other holiday and sharing the big ones like Christmas and Easter and then switching the alternating schedule the following year. If there is a conflict with a holiday scheduled with one parent being on a normal visitation day with the other, there should be open communication about it and a resolution ahead of the day in question. Be sure to communicate any possible time conflicts ahead of the visitation.
2. Plan Ahead
Being involved in your children’s lives is of utmost importance for everyone involved. However, this involves more than simply visitation days. Plan ahead for any conflicting events that may be taking place on your scheduled holiday. Christmas plays, dance recitals, band or choir productions - these should all be noted in your calendar ahead of time so you are able to schedule your time together accordingly.
3. First Things First
With the holidays usually being about spending time with family, it can be difficult to prioritize your schedule so that it isn’t so overwhelmed with travel and seeing everyone on your list that you don’t get any quality time with your child. Sometimes just spending time with their parent is all children want or need. Asking them which events are most important to them can be a great way to respect and bond with your children as well.
4. Be Flexible
Sharing major holidays with your ex may be a big strain, not only on the adults involved but the children as well. Take their feelings into consideration and if they want to see their other parent for an hour or two on your assigned day, remember that giving them a choice can enhance their holiday experience. Planning this time in regards to visiting extended family can also be stressful. Remember that another good alternative is that you could ask your extended family to celebrate on a different day if there happens to be a conflict with another event your child really wants to attend.
5. It’s All About The Kids
The best way to make the most of your time with your children for the holidays is to simply BE PRESENT. Even if events or circumstances don't go as planned, don't let your children's memory be that you were bent out of shape. Be intentional to make those events about them and focus on having a great time with them making memories that they will look fondly back on for years to come.
Contact An Experienced Family Law Attorney
To get experienced legal counsel for divorce or visitation rights, be sure contact the Bombardo Law Office. Contact us online or call us at 315-488-5544.